I have always grown up in a Christian home. My parents were the kind that forced my brother and I to go to church on Sunday, sometimes literally dragging us out of bed. And I was the girl that dreaded waking up, putting on nice clothes and sitting at attention on the hard church pew for an hour every Sunday. I always envied my friends whose parents did put their children through that type of torture. God has always been a part of me, something I just accepted as reality. I grew up singing "Jesus Loves Me" and hearing the same stories told over and over again in church.
Now I'm older, although probably not much wiser, I have a different outlook on life. I can't just accept everything I am told as truth, even God. I don't believe that God wanted us to just accept Him without question, either. I believe He wants us to find Him in our own way, and when that time comes, He will accept us without question. Now, more than ever, I pray. When times are hard, it's easier to talk things through, and for me, God is always there to listen. I find myself talking to no one as I fall asleep at night, and yet, it feels like someone is listening. It feels like someone understands my pain and is truly concerned for my wellbeing. That is a great feeling. I am finding God in my own way and plan to continue on this path.
P.S. I feel like I'm adding resolutions to the list a lot more than I am crossing them off, maybe because its still the first half of the year? Let's hope..
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